Eating food with your left hand cause you need the other one for scrolling

 me: Hi may I get a caramel frappuccino
    starbucks: Sure, may I get your name please
    me: Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya De La Rosa Ramirez

 If you’re attractive and you talk to me first, chances are I’m very confused

 my mom: it’s 11 pm go to sleep
    me: actually its 10:58 pm

 I wish my stomach was as flat as the pizza I’m about to eat

 *tries to fix sleeping schedule* *makes it worse*

 I want kids but I dont wanna be pregnant or give birth but I dont wanna adopt either because I want them to be mine. do you see my problem?

 Rules to learning English
1. their our know rules

 It’s actually embarrassing how much i care about having access to internet 24/7

 I just realized that “never” is a contraction of “not ever”
and “blush” is a contraction of “blood rush”
also “studying” is a contraction of “student dying”

 If it’s both terrifying and amazing then you should definitely pursue it.

 Most people die at 25 and aren’t buried until they’re 75 ― Benjamin Franklin

 If you should be studying and you know it clap your hands

 You haven’t experienced awkward until you’ve tried to tickle someone who isn’t ticklish

Damn, yeah! (part 1): click HERE // Damn yeah! (part 2): click HERE // Damn, yeah! (part 3): click HERE // Damn, yeah! (part 4): click HERE

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